


Wait, What?!?

by The_Devil_In_The_Details_666



Series: All The Batfam BS [1]
Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Bruce is oblivious, Canon? What's A Canon?, Dick is Nosy, F/F, Gen, M/M, Short & Sweet, it's nonsense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-12
Updated: 2019-10-12
Packaged: 2020-12-13 22:01:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21004835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Devil_In_The_Details_666/pseuds/The_Devil_In_The_Details_666
Summary: Honestly, how the hell did Bruce and Dick miss the signs?





	Wait, What?!?

**Author's Note:**

> THIS IS SO DUMB AND I'M SO SORRY! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!!

Tim and Jason had been together for nearly nine years when someone finally figured it out. Unsurprisingly, it was Dick, that nosy asshole, and he decided to bring it up at the worst possible time.

“So, Tim, when were you planning to tell us that you and Jason are dating?”

The breakfast table went totally silent as everyone stared at Tim and Jason. Tim could see the wheels in Bruce’s head turning as his father’s eyes got wider and wider, but, before Bruce could say anything, Jason made the decision to pipe up.

“Our love life is none of your business, Dickhead.”

Dick pouted like a child and opened his mouth, but whatever words were going to be spoken were forestalled by Stephanie, that angel in purple pajama pants, who lobbed a strawberry at Dick and cried dramatically, “Cass and I are dating too, you know! But noooooo, all you care about is that Tim and Jason have been-”

Bruce made an odd wheezing noise, like a punctured accordion, and ordered, “Don’t finish that sentence.”

Steph responded by nailing Bruce between the eyes with a blueberry and melodramatically huffing, “Don’t tell me what to do. As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, all you care about is that Tim and Jason have been dating for like four years and didn’t tell you two nosy pricks because they knew that you’d go shoving your noses where they don’t belong. Which you did anyway, to the shock and awe of absolutely no one.”

Tim made a mental note to take Steph out for all the waffles she could eat (and to give her back the t-shirt he had borrowed like three years prior, oops). Dick’s eyes went wide and he whined, “You knew?!? Also, YOU AND CASS ARE DATING?!?”

Steph snorted derisively and answered, “Everyone knew. Except, y’know, you. And Bruce, apparently. It’s not like they’re particularly quiet about it. And yes, Dick, Cass and I are dating. How have you not noticed that I AM LITERALLY SITTING IN HER LAP RIGHT NOW, YOU UNOBSERVANT MUSHROOM?”

Dick turned big, pleading eyes on Damian, who arched one eyebrow and stated flatly, “Drake and Todd are far from subtle, perhaps even less so than Brown and Cain. Honestly, Grayson, how you are so unobservant to have missed their relationships astounds me.”

Dick turned his attention to Duke, who just held up his hands in surrender and announced, “Nope. Not getting involved. Talk to me when it’s over.”

Tim leaned into Jason’s side as the pair watched Dick have a mental breakdown over his total lack of awareness and Jason wrapped an arm around Tim’s shoulders, kissing his head with an amused smile playing at his lips. Tim gently toyed with Jason’s fingers, kissing the golden ring wrapped around his ring finger and whispering, “When do you think they’ll realize we’re more than dating?”

Jason just shook his head and answered, “Eh, probably the day they get the wedding invite, Mr. Soon-to-be-Drake-Todd.”


End file.
